my family & me

4 important questions to ask your to-be life partner

By admin

March 08, 2017

If there is any other thing that is as important in the life as love, it is Marriage. We would leave it to the word enthusiast to find out if the marriage word has its roots in “merry” that could reflect that it is essentially a happy milestone of one’s life. However, it is for sure that if people use their right and left brain collectively they would be in a better position to live a fruitful life. Here are a few factors that you should keep in mind while discussing your future life with your to-be partner:

If you are hidden beneath debt, don’t shy to discuss

While everyone would like to flaunt their latest platinum jewelry piece or the high-end designer suit, no one is willing to discuss the debt that turned such expensive shopping dream into reality. Not that it is something to be discussed with everyone, but you should not hide it from your to-be partner, especially if the debts are really high. You partners might have some dreams: buying a new house, having a new car or enjoying the luxuries of life with collective income. These dreams and lifestyle aspirations will be affected if a considerable chunk of your income goes towards repaying your debts. Your outstanding debts can disappoint your partner and make them feel cheated if it is revealed after marriage. It is more important to discuss debts with the partners if you think that your income is way too low to pay the debts that are continually inflating due to interest and you might need some help to repay the debts.

Know about their spending patterns

Everyone has different spending patterns and in order to live a harmonious life it is very important to know whether your partners’ spending methods are agreeable to you in the long run. People’s spending patterns are based on their perspective towards life. Some people classify life into different stages and think that lifestyle should mimic the earning capacity. Thus, they reason that youth is the time when one can afford to go spendthrift. There are people who think that one should save as much as possible for old age while they are still earning and so they support conservative spending patterns. So, you should know about the spending patterns of your to-be partner before you marry rather than finding your sweet relations turning bitter over money matters.

Avoid cultural wars

If you are marrying with a person having a different culture then it is very important to design the cultural environment of your home. Apart from difference in belief many day to day activities and lifestyle options are also influenced by culture. Some cultures may not even allow you to enter into house with your slippers on while other cultures would emphasize more on inner purity. Similarly, some cultures emphasize on frequent fasts. There are some cultures that may require an equal participation of the partner in specific rituals or fasts. You might not be comfortable with the same. So, it is very important to know about various religious and lifestyle options of your partner and design a “combo-culture” (that will prevail in the house) with a few compromises and few privileges for each partner.

Discuss your old life

The youth is full of romance and middle age slips through fingers while fulfilling responsibilities. Then comes the old age when you have the sufficient time to spend together. Hence, it is very important to know the dreams and aspirations of your partner regarding the old age. It is even more important of you harbor some dreams about having a great time with your partner when your hair turn silver. Would s/he share your dream of spending quality time together at a villa in an island or would s/he better dedicate her life for social service? Old age brings a careless attitude and allows a person to live the life his/her own way. After all the last thing you might expect to hear is that your partner wants to retire in a cottage in a jungle to fulfill his dreams of living a solitary life! It is better to hear it before you marry rather than at the time when you are 70+!