Womansera

4 things you should discuss with your to be partner before marrying

Marriage is one of the merriest things to happen in one’s life. Who can match the Romantic fervor that fills the heart of to-be couple? However, marriage is not all about romance and love, but also about commitment and lifestyle. The difference of lifestyle and nature can sour sweet relations and may turn your marriage into nightmare. So, it is important to ask you to-be partner about their lifestyle habits that can impact your marriage. Apart from children and past relations, there are other topics that you need to discuss with them in order to ensure that your marriage would last long.

Budget

Proverbial houses might be made with love but the real houses are made with brick and mortar that comes with money. Callous it may sound but it is true. Another truth is that the budget management strategy plays an important role in impacting the relationships. Spending a good amount on outing, food, shopping, picnic and parties is perfectly alright for someone who believes in “work hard, party harder”. But those who believe in saving something for the rainy day may not appreciate this strategy. Hence, you should talk frankly and deeply with your partner regarding their spending patterns, saving strategy and wealth management objectives. The partners with opposite outlook on these matters may find them at loggerheads quite frequently.

Note: The exception also exists. If you are a hopeless spendthrift but still hope to build a good fortune then a partner with excellent wealth management strategy would be a great asset for you! In this case the different financial outlooks play an important role in cementing the relationship.

Privacy

Every person craves for a certain privacy and it isn’t a sin. However, you should discuss this with your future partner. Whether you like to enjoy at least 1-2 hours “with yourself” or dedicate a good time to your hobbies that essentially require you to spend your time in quietude, like writing or painting, you should discuss the same with your future partner. Your privacy may not be appreciated by your partner, especially if s/he is extreme sociable. S/he might interpret such “privacy requests” as ignoring their presence. Most of the times such cases lead to small fights that gradually develop into bickering and may also result in permanent strife.

Parents

Though you might be madly in love with your partner, the same might not be true in case of their parents. However, the marriage does not happen between two individuals but 2 families. So, it is very important to acquaint yourself with your partners’ parents and tell them to do the same. Also you need to share the thoughts on whether or not you like each other’s parents. Be frank. If you don’t like the money-minded father of your partner or too conservational outlook of the mother, then tell them. It is better to discuss these things before marrying rather than jeopardizing your married relationship when such issues raise their heads or threaten your marriage in the future.  Also you should discuss how you are going to manage the dislikes.  Would you mind if their parents visit your home frequently or would you like to maintain a strict distance from them?  What are your takes on in-laws relationships? How far or how near would you like to keep them? Would you be willing to spend a few days every quarter staying with your old or ailing in-laws? What are your partners’ expectations regarding your relationship with in-laws? These are some of the most important questions t asks your future partner.

…..and Hygiene too?

When you talk about romance, love and sweet moments, the words like toilet, smell or haphazard bedroom are the last things that come to your mind. But these things creep in slowly and before you know start affecting your relationship.  You might be okay without a deo for weeks together but your love towards organic living might not be appreciated by your partner. Likewise being in a hurry in the morning can e a perfectly agreeable reason for you to leave your toilet untidy or wet but it may not be acceptable to your partner. And all you hygiene freaks, there are people in this world who frequently forget to use air freshener in the toilets. Be sure to discuss these hygiene matters very frankly before marriage. It may not sound good but is very important if you don’t want the wetness of toilet to dampen your relationships or any unpleasant smell to fade away the fragrance of your relation.