Womansera

Why Gossip hurts so much!

Ramya returned shattered from her kitty party. Everyone there knew her secret that she had shared with her closest friend Shalu. She trusted Shalu would keep her secret to herself but she was wrong. Shalu could not resist gossiping Ramya’s secret that her husband was fired from his company, as it was her favorite activity. Ramya was very furious and asked shalu for an explanation. Shalu smartly denied to have gossiped anything but Ramya was sure it was she to have spread the news in their friend circle. Ramya repented to have let out her well kept secret to Shalu whom she considered her best friend.

“Gossiping”, we all have been a part of gossiping that pumps excitement in the atmosphere. We all talk about others. But when it comes to oneself it makes us feel left out, depressed, stressed, angry and frustrated. We all have secrets in our personal and professional lives that we do not want anyone to know or talk about them. But to relieve our stress we may talk about it to someone close and trustworthy. This may prove fatal if the person cannot maintain our trust. Words once spoken can never be recalled. So before giving the weapon of your mental disturbance to anyone make sure the person is right. Remember anyone who gossips to you about others will gossip about you to others. As Arthur Schopenhauer puts, “If I maintain my silence about my secret it is my prisoner….if I let it slip from my tongue I am its prisoner.”

If you are already a fresh topic among the gossipmongers and thanks to your close buddy for this then follow these tips:-

1. If the gossip is hurting you confront your friend in a way that does not bring resentment in her but makes her understand that she has broken your trust. Be firm and direct. Let her know how you considered her your good friend but she could not maintain the respect of your relationship.

2. Gossip in return of gossip will invite more gossip. Being a good friend you too may know your friends secrets. And would strongly feel to let them out as revenge. But this will bring in enmity between both of you and worsen the situation. Remember its people who enjoy when two people gossip about each other.

3. Act normally in front of others. Even if someone tries to poke you on the latest heard gossip about you just laugh it away or dismiss it as a rumor than showing fierce reaction. There is no way you can stop people to talk.

4. Don’t waste your time with explanation. People only hear what they want to hear.

5. Stop sharing your secrets especially with your so called friend who has brought disturbance in your life.

6. Cease your friendship or relation with any person who cannot maintain your trust. She is not worthy of your time and friendship.

7. Everything passes away with time and this will too. Donot over think about what people talk. Just maintain calm and normal healthy lifestyle. Keep away from people who are gossiping about you as this will bring in stress each time you meet them.

8. Talk to your old trustworthy friends or people who are not aware of your latest gossip. This will help you to be happy.